A young couple is dancing. The woman’s long hair reaches her hips in her black dress. The man is wearing a dark sweater, jeans and a gold chain, his hair is styled in a curl with pomade. They both jump in circles, laughing and holding hands. Then they look at the cell phone camera that recorded everything. They seem happy. In the 15 seconds that the video lasts, it says in black letters above: “If there is no drama in your relationship.”
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In the clip, which was uploaded to Tiktok on July 4, 2021, followers are not happy for the couple. They write: “Proof that you shouldn’t believe everything you see on social media” and “It’s so tragic. She just wanted to live her life.” But usually it says “rest in peace”. Because the young woman in the video is no longer alive. She was murdered by the man who was not only her partner, but also an ambitious TikToker.
Impressions of “Scarface”
Ali Abulaban, known on TikTok as JinnKid, was on the verge of breaking through on the platform. Impressions of Al Pacino’s role as Tony Montana in the gangster drama “Scarface” earned him millions of views. He moved to San Diego with his wife Ana to further his career. On the outside, in the artificial world of social media, everything seemed to be going well. A child together, a growing following, moving to a big city. But in the real world there was one thing above all between the model couple: domestic violence, drugs, a turbulent marriage on the verge of divorce.
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My friend, the influencer: the illusion of intimacy
Whether it’s a social media star, newscaster or actor, when celebrities seem more familiar to us than our own neighbors, this is called “parasocial relationships.” In his essay, RND author Timm Lewerenz asks: what do such ties do to us? And when do they go too far?
Instead of social media, Abulaban’s stage is now the courtroom. His mobile phone camera is no longer filming, but that of the YouTube channel ‘Court TV’. In the US, unlike Germany, cameras are generally allowed in courtrooms. It seems an irony of fate that the unfiltered truth is now coming to light in court in San Diego. No editing, no economical cropping of video clips.
The Abulaban trial shows how limited the world of social media is, how it does not represent the truth, but only what gets clicks and, above all, puts you in a good mood. And he educationally demonstrates that the person who gains the public’s favor isn’t always who they think they are. But social media creates a bond; followers think they know their influencers and can be close to them. In research this is called ‘parasocial interaction’.
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“I’ve never met anyone like you”
A video uploaded to Tiktok by his wife Ana on December 11, 2020, shows short clips of her husband cradling their daughter and dancing at a club. A soundtrack plays in the background: ‘I’ve never met anyone like you. And I don’t think I ever will again. I know it sounds like a cliché, but no one has ever touched me like you.” Influencers have made a career out of giving intimate insights into private lives, posting love-filled photos from vacations, interspersed with reflections on self-doubt and the suffering of others World. But the intimacy only exists at a distance, it is only staged.
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Shortly after the couple’s video, Ana reportedly filed a restraining order, it will be said later in court. It is said that they reconciled again and again; there are many emails the couple sent each other during that time. Then in October 2021 the marriage falls apart completely. Ali Abulaban moves to a nearby hotel. Since then, he has been stalking her and installing an app on her daughter’s tablet to listen to Ana. Ana and Ali’s story is not only one of lovers, but also one of jealousy, violence and control. Besides Ana, Ali Abulaban also shoots his friend Ray because he thinks he is his wife’s affair. The process filters all of this out.
When he is convicted, there is cheering in the room
Recordings of their life together weren’t just the couple’s daily life on Tiktok. Audio clips are played repeatedly during the trial. They come from video footage from the surveillance cameras in her apartment, including shortly before Abulaban kills her. A shot is fired. Then four. Then a woman screams. One last shot. Abulaban nervously runs out the door, turns around, mumbles, curses, and then goes back into the apartment. He calls his mother and sends her a photo of his murdered wife and his friend. He then calls 911 and leaves the building. An act of jealousy because he thought she had cheated on him. And an act out of thoughts of power, because he thought she was his and no one else’s. This is evident in the process when he is asked whether Ana can have a new relationship after the divorce. Abulaban replies: “Absolutely not.”
JinnKid can no longer read the reactions to his actions on social media. He has been in prison since the double murder in October 2021. But he no longer has to read what people in the world of the Internet think about him. He also feels it in the real world, in the courtroom.
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When the jury finds him guilty of all charges of first-degree murder, a cheer erupts in the room. There are friends and relatives of the victims who guided the process. Her best friend will say afterwards that the verdict is liberation and justice for Ana and Ray. Ana always defended Ali from her friends. “Because she wanted to see the good in him,” she says through tears. Ali Abulaban faces life imprisonment without the prospect of parole. His Tiktok account is now deactivated. More condolences are sent to his wife every day.